First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I need a burrito and a hug.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
