it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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