ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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