I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
be right there i have to get my cape
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Randomize
