White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
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