My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Randomize
