My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Randomize
