discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
