similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
