I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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