D3 body, D1 cock
3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
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