OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Randomize
