He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
