I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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