the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
