Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Did I show you my penis last night?
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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