Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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