It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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