I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
