Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
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