Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize
