My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
