This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
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