Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Randomize
