I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
