am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize
