@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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