Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Your penis caused this!
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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