Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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