I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Randomize