my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Randomize
