do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
I just blew my weed a kiss
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Randomize
