capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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