check it out our google latitudes are spooning
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Randomize
