My nipple is on Facebook.
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
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