So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Watching her eat just hurts me
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
