she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
