Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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