The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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