I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize
