I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
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