Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
