She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Randomize