we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
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