So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Randomize