I CAN MOONWALK!
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Randomize
