that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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