How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Siri makes being stoned even easier. I don't even Have to type my texts myself
Though I typed a half of that one
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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