dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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