The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
We have so much sex to catch up on
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Randomize
