had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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